The Hidden Agenda Ghost
This seems to be a common theme I read in several articles. Particularly on people who seem too friendly (or dare I say the word nice). It’s really frightening how the word nice has such a negative connotation when you look up the various nice guy or nice girl articles (really guy..let’s be honest) to the point when someone says I’m nice, I can’t tell if it’s in a good way or is I’m being insulted.
Growing up, I always thought the word nice meant someone who was kind, considerate, and had a strong concern for others. I still believe that in a way, but not like I used to. When I see a nice guy title, I immediately get depressed because I know at this point it’s gonna be another assault on guys that are nice in a negative way according to the author’s experience.
The Discovery
When I had my first experience reading one of those nice guy articles, I was horrified by the venom that the author had for these types of men. It was confusing and hard to fathom. What really got me was one of the reasons I constantly keep seeing in these articles. The nice person has a hidden agenda or motive.
Is there truth to that. Absolutely. No doubt about it. I’ve experienced this kind of treachery. But, usually, you can detect the treachery underneath these types of people. They have cracks of evil from the start, it’s just as you get to know them more, that evil manifests itself more into our faces. This is when you go ‘’nope, I don’t want this person in my life’’, as you should.
There’s a lot of manipulative people out in the world who don’t care about other people’s feelings, thoughts, and who they are as a person. Like, mean spirited people. ‘’Oh but they’re so honest and real’’. Yeah that’s their trick, they use that blunt honestly and realness to cover up their vindictive nature. You can be honest and real without being a prick to others.
And this is a constant challenge (even to me still), I’m just getting to that stage because for the longest, I was afraid of hurting other people’s feelings. Meanwhile, I’ve had the misfortune to come across a lot of people in my life who could have cared less about hurting mines. So that hurt and pain I don’t wish onto others unless they clearly earned it.
I honestly believe nice people are too easy a target for mean people to take their rage out on. That’s why I don’t get wowed when I see people take shots at shy or nice people. I like to see these types of people use that same rage on overpaid billionaires, evil, and people who really do people massive harm, that’s where the real fun is at.
Besides, everyone has an agenda not just nice people. Not nice people have a more sinister agenda than the nice people they love to depised. Look, I get it, we all been let down by someone or too many people who we thought had our best interests at heart, but to label everyone as being fake because they don’t act the way you believe they should is pure pettiness.
All I see is hurt people projecting their experiences onto others which continues the cycle of isolation and loneliness.
It seems like the name of the game these days is to see who can be unavailable to others the most, which I believe is really sad because they’re so many potential friendships/relationships lost because people now want to prove how not-nice they can be to the other person. It’s really depressing the more I dwell on it.
‘’Nice people have a hidden agenda’’. Yeah, I have a hidden agenda, my agenda is that I find you interesting, bubbly, and fun to be around. My problem is that I didn’t have the courage to communicate that to you in words.
A lot of truly nice people weren’t encouraged to speak freely, somehow, they had lost that right at an early age and felt that walking on eggshells was the only opinion they had.
I’m not saying it’s right or wrong, it’s just the cards some people were given. Let’s show mercy to those kinds of people. Let them grow into themselves or be who they are. Everybody can’t be mean all the time just to be mean. That’s not a fun person to be around.
